| by Kenneth Chase | No comments

“Tutorial” Super Apartment Bros. – Meet the Characters

Thank you for seeing me on such short notice. Shall we start this off? I’m sure you have lots of questions. My name is Sophie, I’m a cat-girl, ninja princess. And I’ll claw your throat out if you
don’t stop looking at me like that. No, it’s pronounced Igam, you sound stupid when you say it that way. G, R, I, two Fs, I, N. Yup, Griffin, that’s it. A cat-girl, ninja princess, why is that so hard
to understand? Are you stupid or something? EEEEEEEE-Guuuuuuuummm! What do you mean, ‘what do I do for a living’? Well I like to say I live for a living. Heh, heh, hey.. Ahem, but yeah, I make my money killing stuff. I’m a mage of course! What you think
I dress like this for the ladies? My laziness is the only thing standing between
you and a serious beating right now. I’m not kidding. Let me tell you, there’s no feeling in the world like watching the light go out in the eyes
of a robot, nazi zombie for the first time. It’s a pretty emotional moment for any young soldier. I’m sorry, what was the question again? I’m sorry, what was the question again? I mean, don’t get me wrong, the ladies do love it. But mostly I dress like this because of the, made thing. I was a space marine for many years. But I, kind
of hung up my guns a while back. They’re all on the wall now for easier access. Oh, I thought you said it’s ‘not Grunt controlled’. Suuure, I’m totally open to having roommates. I can’t very well steal from myself can I? Hahaha, ohhh I’m a kidder. Well I can say up front I won’t live
with mutants, or robots, most types of aliens.. If it’ll get this interview over with, yes. Umm, no terrorists, but who would want to live with
one of them? Always popping out at you! Uhh, no zombies either. By the way.. what’s the policy on late rent payments? And definitely no demons. Other than that, I basically get along with everybody. Hmmmm, right. Is that all? Well? So what do you say? Oh I think I have justa the place for you.

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