| by Kenneth Chase | 100 comments

Tokyo Ghoul IN 5 MINUTES

Ghouls are basically glorified vampires that eat human flesh. That’s why this shit’s stupidly popular on Tumblr! HEY OL’ BUDDY OL’ PAL! I’m your BEST FRIEND! Even though I’m not that actually relevant till the end. GO HIT ON THAT GIRL!! You mean the edgy teenager who looks like she has daddy issues? hi No, THAT ONE. Do you want to come over for dinner? [Fuck yeah she wants to have me for dinner!] OH GOD SHE’S HAVING ME FOR DINNER!! Tough luck! I’m one of the strongest ghouls out there! Hahahah! HAHAHAHA- (lol) FALLING PIPES… MY ONE WEAKNESS!!! O-shi-e-te- *coughing n’ shit* “Nope, can’t do it.” Well that date could have gone better. All your organs were ruptured but luckily there was a random lady next to you with all her organs intact! So we just put them in you, no questions asked! That sounds stupidly illegal and irresponsible. I KNOW! btdubs If you’re a ghoul, you can’t eat human food! (desperation) [I DON’T WANNA BE A GHOUL]*vomiting in the toilet* (crying) Hey, uh, are you gonna eat that? *KICK* What the fuck is wrong with you? *ANOTHER KICK* Oh it’s you… eat this human meat. NO! I DON’T WANNA BE A GHOUL. Eat it! I DON’T WANNA BE A GHOUL! (Kaneki still crying, spewing unintelligble nonsense) *SLAM* Nobody gives a shit! Gramps, he won’t stop crying… can you help? Drink coffee. Wow, this is great. See? This isn’t so bad- (Kaneki cries some more) There he goes again! C’mon. We need to get you a mask from anime Skrillex. Hi, I’m anime Skrillex, and I’m not actually gonna do anything in the show. ME TOO! Me three. What about him? I’m fabulous and a potential pedophile! Would you like to come back with me for some candy? [Now Kaneki dear…] [Remember what Mama told you to say when strange men who are potential pedophiles offer you candy?] YES! MOM YOU LIED TO ME!! Sheesh, it was just a joke. Here, you can clean up at my place. [I don’t see any harm in that!] *Take My Breath Awaaayyyy!* (HARMONYYYY!!!) (gross) I’m a maniacal sadistic fuck who looks like he raped babies for a living! I’m the righteous white knight partner! Who for some reason doesn’t care about anything he does. Oohhh look… A defenseless little girl! Would you like some candy? Don’t fall for it it’s a trap! AAGH! [Where the hell is that Kaneki when I need him?] Oh what the fuck? (Kaneki crying and spewing unintelligible nonsense… again) I LITERALLY HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THE FUCK YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT! *WHOOPS* [Oh God what have I done] Shh, It’s okay, have a Snickers. I can’t believe I got killed by a little girl! Serves you right you sadistic- [Wait a minute] *climax intestifies* [I LEFT THE STOVE ON!] [oh and he was married] … nooooooo…. I’m looking for my sister. Nii-ssan? He’s your brother?! (dun Dun DUU-) Well, you two DO look very alike. *Jason fucks up Kaneki* Kaneki’s been kidnapped! Oh I’m sure he’s doing fine! (Screaming in the background) Ninety nine bottles of beer on the wall. Ninety nine bottles of beer! Alright, I GUESS we can get him. Why are you doing this to me, Jason? BECAUSE I’M A WALKING COPYRIGHT INFRINGEMENT!!! Haha, you look pathetic. Says the person who got killed by some falling pipes… Fuck you. Hax mode: ON! What?! Why has your hair turned white? ‘Cause it makes me look more badass. So why have your nails turned black? ‘Cause it makes me look FABULLOOUUUSSSS!!!! (Jason jealous of Kaneki’s fab) It’s the most dangerous Ghoul of all time… The One-eyed Owl. Woah Kaneki you look different. I am not Kaneki anymore, I am… Kan-edgy. *silence* Fuck you I have white hair. So, are you coming back with us? Thanks, but Imma join the people who kidnapped and tortured me. What? That makes no sense! Probably does in the manga! I’ll always remember your physically deformed face as you were trying to slaughter children. Hey hotness, what brings you to this grave? He’s my dad. HE’S YOUR WHAT? We were so desperate for new recruits we even hired a small boy! Why are you a girl? I DUNNO! Will you be my daddy? Sure. Just make sure to behave yourse- (maniacal laughter in background) Oh, there he goes maniacally killing things again! They grow up so fast… WATCH ME SPIN THIS PEN! BBBRRRROOOOOHHHHAHAHAA oYAAAA!!!!!! So, what now? We listen to the out of nowhere awesome soundtrack! *Glassy Sky plays while out of nowhere awesome things happen* Does any of what happen matter anyway? Probably does in the manga! OH FOR FUCK’S SAKE! Touka! Kaneki’s back in town! [He’s what?] (DEJA VU) *Deja Vu by Initial D plays* hi- *PUNCH* FUCK YOU! Fancy meeting you here again… I was thinking about your dad, who I respected a lot. My dad was a psychopath. Yeah well he’s dead now, so we’re supposed to like him. Oh God, talking about my dead father makes me so HORNY. *romantic piano music* [wait a minute…] *never gonna give you up plays* (OHHHHHHHHHH!!!) Hey guys… GUYS! Guess who I’m doing an impression of? *silence* Guys? GUYS? Oh, whatever just start the war! (war starts) I have to find Kaneki! *Running In The 90’s starts playing* (Ready?) *Build-up…* (GO!) *MUSIC INTENSIFIES* [Must Find Kaneki] Oh GOD! You look like Vash the Stampede and Alexander Anderson had a gay mutant baby! And you look like Luigi started taking steroids! [EPIC OWL FIGHT] [epic owl fight] (RUNNING IN THE 90’S! IT’S A NEW WAY OF LIFE TO ME!) I’m DYING, ol’buddy ol’pal! No! *whimpering* You were…you were… wait, who were you again? I WAS YOUR BEST FRIEND! You were my best friend! [Don’t worry pal] [I’ll get you to the place you belong.] *opening theme song Unravel plays* [Here we go] [we should be getting there aaany second now…] [OH GOD HOW LONG HAVE I BEEN WALKING?!?!] [My legs are in so much PAIN!] [Are we almost there yet?] [I hope to GOD Touka is doing better than ME!] Olympics announcer: “And Jamaica retain their title, 36.85; and the world record has been taken apart!” *Nightcore version of Unravel plays* Hey guys, Gigguk here! Hope you enjoyed the latest episode of anime in minutes! If you’d like to see the previous episode, which was Sword Art Online, or any featured episodes then just click on the links here! And I’d like to give a HUGE thanks to my voice actors for doing a GREAT job at making this episode what it was. Also I know I said in the previous episode that I was aiming for a monthly schedule but, in case you missed it, it’s looking more like a 6-week schedule per episode at the moment considering how much work it takes… unless I can find someone to help me lessen the load in the future. Anyway that’s it for me, not many updates from me today. So, I’ve been Gigguk and I’ll see you all next time!



Oct 10, 2019, 11:52 pm Reply

Damn the process of characterisation is so clear and understanding wish there was anime like this….

Messiah Bent

Oct 10, 2019, 1:26 am Reply

What is up with the candy candy

Abir Mahjoub

Oct 10, 2019, 1:41 am Reply

2:00 ''your not you when you're hungry.''

Ally Mills

Oct 10, 2019, 3:39 am Reply

I don’t wannaaaa beeee a ghoooul

Shiba Inu

Oct 10, 2019, 10:15 am Reply

To Dis day Touka Is Still Running

the sand shark

Oct 10, 2019, 10:23 am Reply

This is so fucking weird

Wolf demon blood

Oct 10, 2019, 10:25 am Reply

My fav part 2:35

cavendor 123

Oct 10, 2019, 1:01 pm Reply

Can we get a season 3 and 4 update

Patrick Vargas

Oct 10, 2019, 3:40 pm Reply



Oct 10, 2019, 4:25 pm Reply

“Shhh it’s okay have a snickers”

_Gacha Alice_

Oct 10, 2019, 4:59 pm Reply

The pen part sent me-

eXe Machina

Oct 10, 2019, 5:11 pm Reply

If anyone tells me my decisions don’t make sense I’m just gonna walk away while saying “Probably does in the manga.”


Oct 10, 2019, 5:17 pm Reply

4:00 me when my girlfriend try to kiss

I dont have a girlfriend 🙁


Oct 10, 2019, 6:47 pm Reply

1:41 fr I was always wondering why he just let his boss do anything

Anirban Das

Oct 10, 2019, 6:58 pm Reply

absolute gold… damn near choked me out… XD


Oct 10, 2019, 7:06 pm Reply

This was worth the 5 minutes I couldn't stop laughing ?


Oct 10, 2019, 9:05 pm Reply

Didnt aged well if u watched the 3 and 4 season

TheTrueBlueBush Gacha

Oct 10, 2019, 3:30 am Reply

2:45 sounds like matpat from game theory

Sammy Mcnunchuks

Oct 10, 2019, 3:44 am Reply

omiowamu shindaiyu IUNI VIRGIN SHEILD ACTIVATE 4:06


Oct 10, 2019, 5:47 am Reply

lol hitlers back in: 4:11

senko senpai

Oct 10, 2019, 9:31 am Reply

Lol dis is my 20th time watching dis

Aron Stålnacke

Oct 10, 2019, 3:09 pm Reply

Falling pipes! My only weakness!

JuJu Be

Oct 10, 2019, 3:40 pm Reply

My mom when I ask for food: 2:02

Me: 😀

L Lawliet

Oct 10, 2019, 4:03 pm Reply

4:58 and what was your name again, ergh


Oct 10, 2019, 4:14 pm Reply


water sheep

Oct 10, 2019, 4:56 pm Reply

Title of video:Tokyo ghoul in 5 mins
Me looks:5:59min

Dr.Salty .M.D.

Oct 10, 2019, 5:47 pm Reply

Random waifu: he’s my dad
Cop guy, who knows that the guy looked like if Charles Manson looked like the way his name sounded:*INHALES* HES YUOR WAT?

Dr.Salty .M.D.

Oct 10, 2019, 5:51 pm Reply

Every time I listen to that bass drop,I physically have to restrain myself. From running

The gaming beast

Oct 10, 2019, 6:45 pm Reply

"I left the stove on," Can't eat human meat

Dang Sam

Oct 10, 2019, 7:28 pm Reply

Are u thinking about tk: re


Oct 10, 2019, 7:45 pm Reply

I haven’t laughed so bad,


Oct 10, 2019, 7:56 pm Reply

I can only hear krillin from dbz abridged…..


Oct 10, 2019, 8:09 pm Reply

This video is borderline 6 minutes.

Nykole Wade

Oct 10, 2019, 8:39 pm Reply



Oct 10, 2019, 9:31 pm Reply

I'll make more sence in the manga

Yeet Yeet

Oct 10, 2019, 10:49 pm Reply

Self cockblocker he didn’t feel like banging cheeks tonight


Oct 10, 2019, 11:06 pm Reply

and then. Season 3

Mystery cookie

Oct 10, 2019, 11:18 pm Reply

2:00 gets stabbed
It’s okay have a snickers


Oct 10, 2019, 11:22 pm Reply

2:51 Kills me KAN-EDGY

Vaibhav Singh

Oct 10, 2019, 12:03 am Reply

Wow this is better than the anime

Epic 91

Oct 10, 2019, 2:43 am Reply

Watch me spin this pen (*has a fucking seizure*)

Jenitzi G

Oct 10, 2019, 3:11 am Reply

“That’s doesn’t make sense!”

“Probably dose in the manga”

Goku’s Big Toe

Oct 10, 2019, 5:57 am Reply

theres a 3rd series u know


Oct 10, 2019, 9:16 am Reply

World war three starts
Me: eat a snickers

Misha Wisha

Oct 10, 2019, 11:45 am Reply


Miksi Cool

Oct 10, 2019, 3:31 pm Reply

1:10. Rip

Rado sucks

Oct 10, 2019, 4:59 pm Reply

nobody gives a shit kaneki

boo boo

Oct 10, 2019, 5:40 pm Reply

XDDDD she want to have me for Dinner oh fuck she having me for Dinner

Cheeki Breeki Motherfucker

Oct 10, 2019, 6:36 pm Reply

This "Its ok have a Snickers" just killed me

Everet Lastly

Oct 10, 2019, 7:51 pm Reply

0:45 to 1:01 PLEASE SHADDAP!!!!!!


Oct 10, 2019, 8:01 pm Reply


Madison Cope

Oct 10, 2019, 8:01 pm Reply


Madison Cope

Oct 10, 2019, 8:02 pm Reply

‘Shh- It’s okay, Here’s a snicker’

Madison Cope

Oct 10, 2019, 8:05 pm Reply

‘Ah- and you look like Luigi who started taking steroids’

el cactus

Oct 10, 2019, 8:20 pm Reply

Video title: "Tokyo Ghoul in 5 mins"


Barely Adorableuwu

Oct 10, 2019, 9:13 pm Reply



Oct 10, 2019, 11:44 pm Reply

"Though luck I'm one of the toughest ghouls out there… did I mention my weakness is pip-"

Main character: nope but idc DIE BOI
Me: hmmmmmm yeah I mean look above you pipes
Death: yeeyy I get to kill now slice YEY

Mia Raimondi

Oct 10, 2019, 12:16 am Reply



Oct 10, 2019, 12:48 am Reply

Initial Touka


Oct 10, 2019, 12:49 am Reply


im gay ._.

Oct 10, 2019, 2:48 am Reply


Jordan Casavant

Oct 10, 2019, 3:21 am Reply

“I’m looking for my sister…”

Dragon Classic

Oct 10, 2019, 3:45 am Reply



Oct 10, 2019, 4:47 am Reply

Anime Skrillex.

red dude

Oct 10, 2019, 7:05 am Reply

I thought kankeki kanNEJI

Howling Claw

Oct 10, 2019, 9:10 am Reply

the abriged is so good

Ń I Ğ H Ț . Ś Ů B Ľ İ M Î Ň Ą Ł Ş

Oct 10, 2019, 10:34 am Reply

*6 minutes

Virginia Entac

Oct 10, 2019, 12:04 pm Reply

Ghoul killer died
Touka: ON NO I LEFT THE STOVE ON……….. Oh and he was married………..noooooooooooooooooo

Chanyeol’s Saranghae In What You Do by EXO

Oct 10, 2019, 2:59 pm Reply

Probably does in the manga

Inan Jarif

Oct 10, 2019, 3:23 pm Reply

"Probably does in the manga"

Anime in a nutshell

Mr. BoB

Oct 10, 2019, 4:57 pm Reply


Fairy Saurus

Oct 10, 2019, 6:39 pm Reply

Did you end it after season 2 on purpose? (subtle drag at season 3?)

Luca Riedler

Oct 10, 2019, 7:04 pm Reply

5:25 how is this Song called?

Cutie girl Chan

Oct 10, 2019, 8:22 pm Reply

The snickers part killed me


Oct 10, 2019, 11:34 pm Reply

3:35 what song is this?

Gene Walker

Oct 10, 2019, 11:58 pm Reply

Shh, its ok have a snickers


Oct 10, 2019, 7:05 am Reply


Вяокеи НзагтеD

Oct 10, 2019, 8:20 am Reply

My guy

Virgin sheild

Omer Krasno

Oct 10, 2019, 3:20 pm Reply

As someone who saw the anime and like it. This is literally the whole anime

oliwia wilk

Oct 10, 2019, 5:51 pm Reply

PrObAbLy It DoEs In ThE MaNgA!

Rojo Raccoon

Oct 10, 2019, 1:44 am Reply

I died laughing while watching this omg

Błâçk ìçé Ø

Oct 10, 2019, 3:00 am Reply

Ha ha you look pathetic says the girl who got killed by falling pipes fuck you HEX MODE ON

Simon S.

Oct 10, 2019, 3:28 am Reply

This is just a video for promoting the manga.

Daddy Trump

Oct 10, 2019, 6:05 am Reply

Do certain races or personality types taste different? I wonder?? Hmm I should find out (:.

Car Music_LT

Oct 10, 2019, 7:02 am Reply

"Me too"
"Me 3"

Avio 755

Oct 10, 2019, 7:34 am Reply

Kaneki sounds more like deadpool?

Yazeed Ammad

Oct 10, 2019, 7:56 am Reply



Oct 10, 2019, 9:20 am Reply

what about tokyo ghoul re

Ellen uwu

Oct 10, 2019, 9:56 am Reply


Lucky_ Noobz

Oct 10, 2019, 11:04 am Reply


Young Madara

Oct 10, 2019, 11:21 am Reply

Kaneki isnt a virgin anymore

BSP güzel star081

Oct 10, 2019, 1:36 pm Reply

Çok iyi

Loner_ Pack

Oct 10, 2019, 2:31 pm Reply


_Gardmax _

Oct 10, 2019, 2:49 pm Reply


Cross HaiRs

Oct 10, 2019, 4:12 pm Reply

Mah god this is sooo accurate ???

Shiro Sunshine

Oct 10, 2019, 5:44 pm Reply

"Why has Your Hair Turn White?"
"Cause it makes me look more badass"
"So why have your nails turned black?"
"Cause it Make me look FABULLOUUUSSSS!!!!"

Me : dying in laughter

Nikodim Zafirovski

Oct 10, 2019, 5:57 pm Reply



Oct 10, 2019, 6:08 pm Reply

The “99 bottles of bear…”


Benjamin ko

Oct 10, 2019, 7:30 pm Reply

Now when people ask me if i have seen tokyo ghoul and ask what my favourite sceene is 4:00

kukko plays

Oct 10, 2019, 8:53 pm Reply

Ok first thing That I see about tokyo ghoul well I think its good start

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