Richard Osman’s House of Games: Champions – S03E98 (11 Mar 2020)
Hello, everybody. I’m Richard Osman. Welcome along to Wednesday’s
House Of Games. It is a very special week. We have
four champions in the studio. It is House Of Champions, and
somebody, at the end of the week, is walking away with this golden
trophy. And it’s going to be one of these
four people. They are Holly Walsh… ..Nish Kumar… ..Sarah Greene… ..and Hugh Dennis. Welcome back. Day three! Now, it’s been good quizzing but,
Nish, you’ve won both shows. Nowhere to go but down. Or…further up. When you said, “One of them will be
going home with the trophy,” you might as well have said, “Nish
will be going home with the trophy.” And one of them certainly won’t,
but there we are. What I should have said is,
“Nish is one of them.” Congratulations, Nish. Now, Sarah,
let’s look at the leaderboard. Why do you always ask me? Each day, you’ve said, “Sarah,
let’s take a look at the prizes “that you’re not going to get.” Sarah, let’s take a look at the
LEADERBOARD or, in your case, the NOT SO LEADERBOARD. The last two days, I agree with you,
I’ve asked you to look at the prizes with me. Today, you’re right, I’ve decided
not to bother. So let’s just take a look at the
weekly leaderboard. That might be more apposite.
If we must. Sarah, you’ve got to come from
behind, there, but it’s pretty close at the top. Sarah, it would be nice to finish at
least third, wouldn’t it? Yeah. Let’s do it. Hugh Dennis, former
champion, trophy-holder as well. Yeah, FORMER champion. Shall we take a look at the prizes
for today? I think so, yes. Let’s do that. Here’s what you can win today. There’s a shower curtain, there’s a
golden tennis racket, there is a golden fondue set, a golden carriage clock and the
golden amulet. Amulet?
SHE LAUGHS The amulet. Well, firstly, I’ll say that the
fondue set is stainless steel, the amulet gives eternal life
to its bearer… I’ve absolutely no interest
in eternal life. I don’t either.
NISH LAUGHS I couldn’t think of anything worse. If you could fix eternal life so you
don’t get any older after about 35, but, actually, if you are going to
be 3,500, what’s the point? Oh, it would be awful, wouldn’t it? And I haven’t made enough
pension contributions. Ha! Listen, the fondue set is the
best prize but the amulet, if you do want eternal life,
it’s a nice prize to have. I mean, you can’t really give it
back, though. That’s the trouble. The amulet? Because if you do die,
it’s hard to return it. Listen, if you don’t want the
amulet, don’t have the amulet. By all means, have the clock.
Or the tennis racket. Anyway, listen, amazing prizes.
We’re all agreed. Shall we play Operation: How Do
We Beat Nish? Yes. Good luck, everyone except Nish! Here we go. Round one today is… Essentially, I’m going to ask you a
series of questions, I need you to give me the answer in
the past tense. OK? Fingers on buzzers, everyone. Here is your first question. Yes, that is Sarah. Beatrix Pottered?
Let’s take a look. There you go, a point to Sarah. You see? And that’s all this
round is. Here’s your next question. Yes, Sarah? The Kar…dash…ian… I don’t think that’s the name of the
show, unfortunately. Holly?
Kept Up With The Kardashians? Is it Kept Up With The Kardashians? It is! Next question in
Blast From The Past Tense. Who is this? Yes, that is Nish.
Wesley Sniped? Is it Wesley Sniped? It is, well done. Next question. Yes, Nish?
Texas held ’em? Well done. I mean…
HUGH: No idea. ..it is what it… Hugh, it is what it is, right? Hugh, it was what it was. It was what it was. I am very much in the
same boat as you. Next question. What is the title of this song? # Trying to figure it out, out, out # All your anticipation
pulls you down… # Yes, Nish?
Let It Shone? Well…
HOLLY: Let It Shined? Here’s what it is. The song is
called Shine, OK? So Shone is the answer. And he said Let It Shone. HUGH: He’s so far ahead, Richard.
Honestly… Well, listen, I’m very
comfortable… Yeah, but do unto others as you’d
want to be done to yourself. Or whatever the expression is.
Up to a point, Holly. I think we should let him have it. He recognised the song, right?
Yeah. We’ll give you that. Let It Shone, we’ll take that. I’m basking in the graciousness
of my fellow competitors. And, listen, that song is by
Took That. Right, here is your next question. Yes, Holly?
Patted. Patted? Patted? Do you know her surname?
Patted Butchered. I’d have given you Patted,
but Patted Butchered is fine. Please, God, make this end.
Next question. Yes, Hugh?
Er, Frankie Went To Hollywood? I mean, surely, right? Yeah, Frankie Went To Hollywood.
Well done. Final question in this round. That’s a shame. What is this? Holly?
Squashed. A tiny bit more?
Butternut Squashed. There we go. We gave you Let It Shone.
Yeah, yeah. That is the end of that round. Shall we take a look at the scores,
or scored? No, because that… No! HOLLY: I’m just glad that
whole round was in the past. Yeah. Exactly. That’s a round where you don’t want
to have an eternal amulet. Let’s take a look at the scores
after round one of Wednesday’s House Of Games. Well played. Shall we play round two?
Yes, please. Round two is always a pairs game. Let’s take a look at which
pairs game it’s going to be. The player in last place gets to
choose their partner. No, I don’t want to choose again.
Hugh? Who would you like to play
with today? Both days you’ve played with Sarah,
both days you’ve been beaten. What would you like to do? Sarah.
Oh! I actually really like that. You really like that he’s shown
himself to be classy and yet you’re still in the team
you want to be in. Nice. Nice touch. Now, in this round I’m going to
read you some questions. All you need to do is buzz in with
the correct answer. If you give me the correct answer, I will then ask your partner to
spell that answer. Ooh! Listen, this won’t be a shock
to you. Sometimes they’re difficult words
to spell. OK, here is your first question. Yes, that is Hugh. Silhouette, presumably? Silhouette is the correct answer,
Hugh. Now, Sarah, could you please,
for the point, spell silhouette. I’ll try. Oh, get out of town. How about that?! Look at that! Thanks, Hugh. You were not
expecting that, were you? Didn’t even break a sweat.
Nicely done, Sarah. Didn’t even break a silhouette. Very well played. Good teamwork
there from Hugh and Sarah. Next question. Yes, that is Hugh. Parliament. Parliament is correct. Sarah, for the point, can you spell
parliament, please? I mean, she doesn’t muck about.
Very well done, Sarah. You picked a good partner here,
Hugh, by the way. I knew it was spelling… Really? From You Smell Terrible?
..from the title of the round. I thought, spelling!
Sarah Greene. She’s probably won spelling bees
and all that kind of stuff. No, I’ve never been in a spelling
bee. Have you never?
Do you think I should? You’re in one right now.
Yes, of course. Yeah. Next question. Fingers on buzzers,
everybody. Yes, that is Nish. Johannesburg. Is it Johannesburg? It is! Holly, I wonder if you might spell
Johannesburg for us? ..H…? Oh, God. It’s not, I’m afraid. I can’t spell for love nor money. Is it another…?
Is it two Ns? Yeah, it’s double N. But then is it B-U-R-G or B-E-R-G?
Yeah, B-U-R-G. I mean, yeah, good luck with that. This round is taking on a real
pattern. Just don’t answer anything, because
I won’t be able to spell it. That’s the key. You’ve got to buzz.
Let me answer it. This round, you’ve got to buzz
in immediately. Yeah, you need to…
OK. Next question. Yes, Holly?
Amphibian. Is it? Not only is that correct, you do not
have to spell it. But Nish does. Nish, spell amphibian. A point to Nish and Holly. Well done, mate. Teamwork. Final question in this round.
Fingers on buzzers, please. Yes, that is Hugh.
Zeppelin. Zeppelin is the correct answer. Sarah, to finish the round with a
flourish, can you spell zeppelin, please? A letter at a time.
OK. And this is the bit.
Hmm. Is right! Sarah, well played!
I didn’t know if it was “Zepplin”. And that is the end of the round. I think that’s the first time
anyone’s got 100% of their spellings right. Let’s have a look at the scores
at the end of that round. Hugh and Sarah, lovely round for
you, there. Oh, my goodness! I don’t want to cast aspersions on
our generation, Holly, but it really felt like spell-check
really screwed us. Four, four, four, four.
Wow. How about that? And we have three rounds to go. So, everyone is on the same score. How can we get between them? Let’s play another round, and the
next round will be… This is a fun round.
Oh, no. What we’re going to do is play you
the first couple of bars of the intro to a song.
All right? We will then fade that song out. What you must all do is buzz in when
you think the singing is going to start. We’ll fade out the music, keep
singing it in your head and, the second you think the first
word of the song arrives, press your buzzers.
Oh, wow. We will time all four of the
buzzers. The person closest wins a point.
Oh, that’s really tough. That’s so difficult. Can’t we have just a little
practice at it first? I’ll tell you what we’ll do – we’ll
do a practice, but with points. That is so Richard Osman.
Yeah. “Yeah, yeah, we’ll do a rehearsal
on tape.” And, at home, get out your
phone and, as soon as you hear the first bar of
the song, press your thing and then press it
again when you think the music starts. See if you can beat anybody here. Are you ready? You’ll hear the first
couple of bars, hopefully you’ll know what the
song is, we’ll fade it out, and the second you hear the first
word come out in your head – not the first noise, the first
word – press your buzzer. Even if the first word is an
“ooh” or an “aah”? That doesn’t count? Just the word. Shall we?
Yep. OK, very best of luck. Here is your
first song. Start your stopwatches now. MUSIC: YMCA
by The Village People MUSIC FADES Have you gone at home? I’ll give you another couple of
seconds in case they’re wrong. OK, so, the song was YMCA. Let’s take a look at your timings,
shall we? Oh, I actually thought you guys
would be doing the other letters. A pretty big difference there. A couple of you went 8, a couple of
you went another four bars at 12. Where are you at home on those? Shall we take a little listen and
see who is closest? MUSIC: YMCA
by The Village People # Young man, there’s no need to feel
down… # Oh, Nish gets it! Of course Nish gets it. Is there nothing this guy can’t do? Well played. It was 11.89. Terrific work if you got close to
that at home. Well played, Nish. Shall we do another one?
No. Yeah. Fingers on buzzers, everyone. And start your stopwatches now. MUSIC: Whenever Wherever
by Shakira MUSIC FADES That felt like people were just
copying each other but, er… Like dominos falling.
I was a bit late. Let’s have a little look at what
that song was. By Shakira. Let’s take a look at the times here. What time did you have at home? Should we see who’s got the points?
Yeah. Play Shakira. My new catchphrase. MUSIC: Whenever Wherever
by Shakira I don’t remember this bit.
It’s a very indie start. Yeah, I… Now I recognise it. # Lucky you were born
that far away so… # Oh! Holly! Yes, mate! Yes! Point for Holly. Final one in this
round. Start your stopwatches now. MUSIC: God Only Knows
by The Beach Boys MUSIC FADES Sarah in first, then Hugh. Oh, Holly, you look confident! I’ll give you another couple of
seconds at home, just in case you’re still waiting. Everybody in? Big differences there. That was The Beach Boys, of course. Let’s take a look at your timings. Where are you at home? Shall we play it and see who’s got
the point? Here we go. MUSIC: God Only Knows
by The Beach Boys # I may not always love you… # Wow, Holly! Second time you get the point.
That shows so much patience. Yeah. Yeah, because it really could
have come in really early. And I did think, “Maybe I am
jumping the gun.” But the strength of character when
everyone else has buzzed in and you’re just still sitting there. That’s a Winston Churchill quote,
isn’t it? It was about that. When it came out, he was such a fan
of Pet Sounds. That’s the end of that round. Very well done if you played that
well at home. Let’s take a look at what it’s
done to the scores. Holly, you’re out in the lead!
Six points. APPLAUSE Two more rounds to go on Wednesday’s
House Of Games. Nish Kumar has won the first two
days of the week. Is he going to win three in a row?
Let’s hope not. I mean, no disrespect. It’s more fun, isn’t it, if someone
else wins? And let’s play round four, shall we?
Round four today is going to be… Now, this is a round where I’m going
to ask you some questions and we have four multiple choice
answers. OK? But you’re each going to have a
go at guessing an answer. So the key thing is who goes first. And we choose who goes first by
getting your answers to various statements. For the first question, it will
be… Holly? Last time you were at a
wedding? Two weeks go. Two weeks ago. Nish? Last summer. Sarah? Exactly a month ago. Hugh? Probably about ten years go. Excellent. Holly, you’re going to go first. Sarah, you’re going to go second. Nish, third. Hugh, fourth. Holly, here’s your question. You get first chance at answering. I’m going to go with MM and MLK Jnr. Is that the correct answer? It is not, I’m afraid. Sarah, you are second to go. Three answers from you to choose
between. I’m going to try Charles Darwin
and Abraham Lincoln. What do you think at home?
Is that a correct answer? It is a correct answer, Sarah.
Very well done. 12th of February, 1809,
they were both born. Who goes first for this next
question? Holly, how many pets have you
owned in your life? Do you count goldfish? I was going
to ask the same question! It depends if you want to go first
or not, I’d say. Three. Is that what you’re saying? That’s
not true though, is it? Three. I’ve owned three pets. Nish? Bew! 400?!
Yeah, yeah. Zero? Zero. So, three, zero, Sarah? Four pets. Hugh? Well, what counts as a pet? Goldfish. Your children do not
count. I have a pond with fish and
frogs in it. Were they named? Did you name them? All the frogs were called Frog…
Yeah. ..and all the fish were called Fish. OK, they don’t sound like pets then.
I think, probably – one, two… Basically, do you want to go
first or not? ..five… I think probably six, actually. Six? Hugh, you’re going to go first.
Sarah, second. Holly, third. Nish, fourth. Hugh, here’s your question.
You go first. One of those is not a Banksy work. Er… I would say Lenin On Rollerblades. Lenin On Rollerblades. Hugh got to
go first. Has it paid off? Incorrect, I’m afraid. Sarah? Old Four-Pet Greene, there. What are you going to go for? I know the balloon picture but I don’t know if it’s called
99 Lead Balloons. I’m going to try 99 Lead Balloons. Is that a correct answer? It is the correct answer! Well played. Final question in this round. Who goes first? Holly, what’s your Chinese zodiac
animal? I think I’m a monkey.
Nish, what are you? Well, I think I’m number four here
because I’m an ox. Unless it turns out that Hugh’s an
elephant. Or you’re a pygmy ox.
It wouldn’t surprise me. Oh, I love a pygmy ox in the
morning. Sarah, what are you? I’m a rooster.
Oh, OK. A rooster, so that’s quite small,
isn’t it? Hugh?
I’m a rabbit. Rabbit? So, rabbit, rooster, a tiny
monkey… A big monkey, though, is…
Yeah. But there are massive rabbits,
aren’t there? There are those huge ones. What do we think? Rabbits?
No, those are men in suits. I’d say a rabbit would be smaller
than a rooster. You think? Am I the only one who
thinks…? We need the old lady, and we need to
know what order she swallowed them in. Perfect. That goes up. So are we going to agree that
rabbit is the smallest? Yes. So we’ll go rabbit, rooster,
monkey, ox. Bringing up the rear.
The mighty ox, bringing up the rear. Here we go. Hugh, here is your
question. There are four possible answers,
and you go first. I mean, this is unfair because he
was in the advert. He definitely did the voiceover. Was it…? It was toothpaste.
It was SR Toothpaste. And, in my previous life, I was the
brand manager of SR Toothpaste. No way! Tension and jeopardy. Let’s find
out, is that right? Very well done. That’s the end of that round.
Let’s find out, as we go into our final round,
what the scores are. Operation: Stop Nish. Look at this! OK, shall we play our final round?
It is… Fingers on buzzers. A point for a correct answer, a
point off for an incorrect answer. Can anybody stop Nish? Let’s find
out our first category. Those will be the pictures, there’ll
be a clue underneath. Smash them together. Best of luck,
everybody. No-one? Shall I tell you?
Hang on. I’ll just tell you. Oh! There you go. I forgot she had a double-barrelled
name. Next question. Oh, what’s his…?
Holly? Jason Kenny Dalglish.
Is that right? Next picture and next clue. Yes, Nish?
Justin Rosebud? Is it? Well played, Nish. Who’s Justin Rose? A golfer.
Next category. Those will be the pictures, there’ll
be a clue underneath. Nish? Laptop Of The Pops? Of course it is. He’s quick on that buzzer. Next picture, next clue. Yes, Nish?
“E-reader, I married him.” Is it “E-reader, I married him?” That makes it sound like Charlotte
Bronte was heavily Yorkshire. “Ey, reader, I married him.” Next device, and next clue. Yes, Nish? Walkie-talkiev? Oh, that’s a good one. Oh, he’s good on these.
He’s good on these. Next category. Those will be the pictures,
there’s a clue underneath. Shall I tell you? Well, I know
what the first answer is. Who’s the guy? Oh, do you know the musical?
Yeah. And I know the guy.
You know the guy? WHISPERING: I know both. Oh, I know it!
Nish? Philip Larkinky Boots. Oh, my God! Well done, Nish.
That’s fantastic. Next picture, next clue.
KLAXON BLARES We’re done. We are done for
Wednesday’s House Of Games. We were trying to stop Nish. Once again, he’s raced his way
through that final round. Is it three in a row for Nish Kumar?
Let’s take a look. It certainly is! Nish, you’ve won yourself a prize. I mean… Have you got a car to
drive all this home? How is it beginning to feel now?
The sort of weight… I mean, it’s starting to feel
like… On Friday, there is the
House Of Games luggage which you might need. What are you going to go for, Nish,
from this little lot? I think I’m going to go for… I’m actually going to go for the
amulet of eternal life. I think you have to. Yeah, I think I’m going to go for
the amulet of eternal life. You might as well remain smug for as
long as you can. Can I genuinely say though, there is
great responsibility with that so please don’t abuse it, OK? There’s only a couple of those in
existence. But congratulations. Nish takes home the House Of Games
golden amulet of eternal life. Well done, Nish. In a way, I’m glad
that you’ve got that. Because, when you model it, you’ll
have to undo your buttons and then it’ll be really, like,
Greek man. Can you do that tomorrow? I would like to see you wearing it
nestled into your nested chest. I was going to say, quite often,
after the credits on this show, if you keep watching people show
off their prizes. Maybe you’re going to see a little
bit of Nish chest hair… Woo! ..and amulet action. Yes! That’d be nice, wouldn’t it? Shall we take a little look at our
weekly leaderboard? No. Two days to go. We’ve got two days to go and don’t
forget Friday is double points, so there’s still plenty of points
up there. Thank you so much for today.
That was a lot of fun. We nearly had him, didn’t we? Can I just say, I tried my best. I literally didn’t even answer
a question for one round. Tomorrow, we reel him in.
Same time, same… That’s just even more rubbing it in,
isn’t it? That’s like, “Guys, I hopped for a
mile “and I still beat you.” I’ll see you all here, same time,
same place tomorrow. We’ll see you as well, same time,
same place on House Of Games. APPLAUSE You look very, sort of,
like a Greek god.