Richard Osman’s House of Games: Champions – S03E100 (13 Mar 2020)
APPLAUSE Hey, everybody. We made it
to Friday. I’m Richard Osman. Welcome to the final
of House Of Games. Not just the final of House Of Games
but the final of House of
Champions. Four former winners have come back. They’ve been battling
it out all week. The awful trophy has moved
so close to me, I can smell it. And I apologise for the smell. Our four players this week, one of them is going
to walk away with it. Who is it going to be? Nish.
It’s going to be one of these four. It’s going to be Nish, not me.
Holly Walsh, possibly. It’s almost certainly
going to be Nish Kumar. Yeah. It is mathematically
impossible to be Sarah Greene. It’s definitely not going to be me.
And surprisingly, also mathematically impossible
to be Hugh Dennis. Welcome, anyway. Is it mathematically impossible?
It is mathematically impossible. Let’s start
with the weekly leaderboard, Hugh, and I’ll show you the maths. So, Friday is double points Friday. Eight points for a win,
six for second, four for third, two for last place. So, you’ll see that you are
eight points behind Nish, so if he comes last and gets two and you come first and get eight, he still beats you. Do you accept my maths?
I do accept your maths. But still, all to play for. There is all to play for though,
cos there’s the glory, as well. Sarah, shall we look at the prizes on Friday’s House Of Games? There’s
some nice prizes. Why not? Yes. Never own one, but we’ll look. There’s the House Of Games
golden onesie. Wow! Why have you got a biohazard suit?
Yeah, I was going to say. There’s the playing cards.
Hazmat suit. There’s the atomiser,
a lovely perfume atomiser. There is the House Of Games
wheelie luggage, which is good, and there’s also
the House Of Games golden chalice. The chalice!
I’d have called that a goblet. But it’s not a goblet,
it’s a chalice. No, I’d say it was a goblet.
It’s definitely a chalice. I think you’ve been ripped off,
mate. No, I dug it up. It’s from Mount Sinai. It grants
the winner three wishes. Right. So, it’s worth winning, but
the wheelie luggage is also great, so, you know, choose wisely. What dubious substance is
in the spray thing? It’s for your own perfume.
Is it not Eau d’Osman? Eau d’Osman, yeah. Lovely.
What’s in there now? Stench d’Osman. I would hate to imagine
what’s in there now. That literally could be anything,
couldn’t it? Is it a good idea, though, to have luggage that stares
back at the officials inspecting it? Yes, cos it makes them feel nervous.
Yeah. Yeah. Imagine how nervous they’d feel when
they’re looking at your luggage. Yeah.
This is you getting your own back. So, Nish has won four shows in a
row. He’s won the first four shows. No-one has ever won
five shows in a row. If you win five shows, of course you
are also going to be our champion. But, Holly,
still in with a chance of winning. I think you’ve been second
pretty much every day, so if you were to win today, there is still an opportunity
to take home our trophy. But, Nish, you are in pole position,
that’s for sure. If you’ve not watched
the rest of the week, every day, it’s been super-close
up to Answer Smash, when Nish really pulls away. So the key, I think,
is to get a bit of a lead. Yeah. It’s been a brilliant week. Champions, thank you so much
for coming back. Shall we decide who’s going to be
our champion of champions, taking home the trophy?
Round one today is… I’m going to read you all out
a statement that is incorrect. You have to change one word
in that statement and it will be correct.
That’s all we’re doing. Holly, we’ll start with you. What
word do you have to change here? “Beckham” to “sponge”. BEEP
It’s not, I’m afraid. Anyone can buzz in if they wish. Shall I tell you?
Change it to “station”. Nish, here is yours. I really don’t know. I’m guessing
it’s either “bath” or “towels”. “Originally made from brioche
and now often contain sultanas.” Shall we time you out, Nish? Yeah, I have absolutely no idea.
I think the word is “towels”, but I wouldn’t know
what to replace it with. We’ve got ourselves a buzzer race. BEEP
Holly wins the buzzer race. Holly? Is “towels” “cakes”? BEEP
It is not, I’m afraid. Hugh? I think it’s “buns”. Well played, Hugh. Bath buns were originally
made from brioche and now often contain sultanas. There you go. Learn something new
every day, don’t we? Sarah, here is yours.
What would you like to change here? Love the thought of it being a hen
night instead. It’s the opposite. It’s a “Silent” Night. A point to Sarah Greene. Well done. Hugh, one for you. I imagine it’s “Dre”
instead of “Who”. Is the right answer. Well done. Holly, back to you.
What would you like to change here? It’s got to be “Gang of Youths”.
It’s either “Gang” or “Youths”. I don’t know. Shall we time you out?
I’ll just have a guess, might as well.
“Youths” is actually “Oldies”. BEEP
It’s not, I’m afraid. Hugh Dennis? Four. Oh, it’s Gang of Four!
I was going to say that. Change “Youths” to “Four”.
Nish, you now. I’ve really not thought about
this film in about 25 years. I believe the film is Free Willy and I believe the incorrect word
is “robot” and it needs to be replaced
with “whale”. Well played, Nish.
It is Free Willy. Nicely done. Sarah, here’s one for you.
What would you like to change here? Um, I think that might be the fact that “Joey Essex” is “David Essex”. Very well played.
It is David Essex. Nicely done. And, Hugh, last one
in this round is for you. There are some disembodied hands…
“Royle” for “Addams”, I think. “Royle” for “Addams”? It is. Change “Royle” to “Addams”.
Well done, Hugh. That’s the end of that round. Now, we said we needed to get a bit
of a lead on Nish in this round. Has that happened after one round of the final of this week’s
House Of Games, House of Champions? Here’s how we stand. APPLAUSE Let’s see what round two
is going to be. It is… It’s a pairs game. The player in last place gets
to choose their partner. Holly, today that is you. Every day
this week, you’ve been with Nish. Would you like to stick with Nish
or play with someone else today? I’m going to stick with Nish.
Stick with Nish. That’s a good show. The old team. Sarah and Hugh, you are
a team once again. Marvellous! One of you take out one tablet
between each pair. You or me?
Shall I take this one? I’m going to give you a category. You just need to give me a correct
answer in that category, OK? But the point goes
to the correct answer which is the furthest down
the alphabet, so the nearest to Z. Here’s the category. So, any town or city
which has hosted the final of
the Eurovision Song Contest, please. Hm, OK. And if you get the last possible
answer, alphabetically, I’m going to give you
a bonus point as well. I don’t know whether that ever has,
but it would seem to make sense. SHE WHISPERS It’s worth trying.
I think so. It’s only a point. Everyone happy? Nish and Holly,
what have you gone for? Zagreb. Zagreb. It’s a long way down the alphabet,
I’ll give you that. Sarah and Hugh, what are you saying?
We said Zagreb. Oh, well, this is exciting! Is Zagreb, for one point each,
a correct answer? BELL It is a correct answer. Are you both
going to score two points? Is that the furthest down
the alphabet you could have gone? The best answer you could possibly
have given was… It was! Two points for everybody. APPLAUSE Here’s your next category. Write me
down an answer to this, please. Crikey. It’s just famous golfers
and it’s not a big tournament. THEY CONFER THEY CONFER Hugh and Sarah,
what answer have you gone with? We think it’s Vijay Singh.
Vijay Singh, you have gone with. They’ve got the look on their face of someone who’s written down
Vijay Singh. Have you written down…?
Vijay Singh as well. For a point, Vijay Singh? BELL It is a correct answer.
A point each. I’ve got an answer that is further
in the alphabet, though, I think. Have you? Yeah. What?
Can I get a point? Yeah, what?
I’m going to say Zach Johnson. Oh! Oh, I don’t know
anything about golf. Let’s take a look. Did he win?
What’s the best answer? You get a point each, though. Final question in this round.
Give me an answer to this, please. What do you think at home
on this one? THEY CONFER We are so far out of the Old. This is one of those things
that may be… Yeah. Some people know them all.
I think you’re right. Yeah? WHISPERS: Does it have two…?
Does it have two Cs in it? I don’t think so, but it might do.
But it doesn’t matter, does it? No? I don’t think so. Nish and Holly, what have you
gone for? Absolute shot in the dark. Zachariah. Zachariah. What have you got, Hugh and Sarah? Zachariah.
LAUGHTER I mean, this round…
It’s going well. It’s going terribly well. Is Zachariah a correct answer? BELL It is a correct answer. Various
different ways of spelling it, but both of yours are acceptable. And have you both got two points? Is that the best possible answer? Ah! Oh, Zephaniah! Oh, stepping in there. Yeah. That is Zachariah going,
“Look at me with my Z,” and Zephaniah going, “Hold my beer!” Yes. Well done if you said
Zephaniah at home. So, that’s a point to everyone
there. Tablets away, please. That’s the end of that round,
and what a difference it has made. What a difference
a single round makes! Let’s take a look at the scores. Nish was losing by three points
before this round. My bet is he’ll still be
losing by three. It’s just…
I do a maths thing in my head. Hugh still in the lead
with eight points. High scoring, I’ll say that for you,
but that’s cos everyone got about the maximum scores
you could do in that last round. Three rounds to go,
three rounds until we discover who’s going to get
their hands on this trophy, three rounds to see if Nish
is going to win five in a row. Never been done before.
Let’s play our next round. It is… In this round, we make questions out of the letters of your names. That’s all we do.
All fingers on buzzers. The first two will be
in the name Holly Walsh. We’ll then move along the line.
A point for a correct answer. If you get an answer on your own
name, you score two points. Nice. OK? First two questions, the answers will be somewhere
in the letters of Holly Walsh. Is this anagrams, is it?
It’s not a full anagram, but we can only use those letters
to make the word. OK. That is Nish. Halo? Well played. It is Halo.
Love that song. It’s a great song. Next one. Two points for Holly, one
for anyone else if you can get this. Yes, Holly? AWOL. Yeah.
AWOL, for two points? It is correct. Very nicely done. Two points for Holly. The next two will be based
on Nish’s name, so the answers are somewhere
in Nish Kumar. That is Hugh. Ursa. A point for Hugh. Well played. Next one. No? How the mighty have fallen, hey?
Its figures are falling. Let’s take a look at the answer. No points there.
Well done if you said that at home. You’ve got Rak-Su in your name
and you didn’t even know it. Didn’t even know it. Or them. The next two are in the name
Sarah Greene. Yes, Hugh? Aegean. Oh, that’s a classy answer,
isn’t it? Well played. Aegean is the right answer.
Next one. Nish? Shearer. The last two are based
on Hugh Dennis’s name. Nish? Singe. It is singe, well done.
And last question in this round. Nish? High? That’s correct, well done.
That’s the end of that round. Very strong finish for Nish. Let’s take a look at the scores
with two rounds to go on Friday’s House Of Games,
our House of Champions. Here’s how we stand. Hugh, still just out in the lead
there. Come on, Hugh! Just, just.
APPLAUSE Round four today is… We play this on our tablets, please. I’m going to read you out
a list of events from history. You just have to write down the year
you think they happened in, and whoever is nearest
gets the point. When did this happen, please? Hm, what do you think at home
for this one? When would it have been? Holly, what’s your thinking and what have you gone for? 1245. 1245. Any reasoning?
It just feels like… I actually did my degree in this,
but I can’t remember, so I’m just having a guess.
What did you do your degree in? Well, I did it in medieval art. Oh, really? And that was
knocking around at the time. Well, yeah, I reckon…
Westminster Abbey and all that. Yeah. I don’t think it’s right,
but I can’t remember. Gotcha, but you think you might
be in the ballpark. Yeah. Nish, where have you gone? 1427. Absolutely no science behind it.
1427. Sarah, what are you thinking? I’ve gone a bit earlier. 1304. Yeah. And Hugh? I’m afraid 1150. I’ve got a bad feeling
Hugh might be right. We’ve got 12th century,
13th century, 14th century and 15th century here. Where are you at home on this one? Let’s take a look.
When was it and who wins the point? Even earlier. Wow! William the Conqueror.
It was William. William the Conqueror,
so Hugh gets the point there. Let’s take a look at your next one. When was Mrs Beeton born? What do you reckon at home
on this one? Mrs Beeton. Nish, any…? Confident on this? I’m going to say 1880. It feels like a sort of 1920s thing. Gotcha. You’ve heard of the book?
Vaguely. OK, yeah. It’s one of those things that, yeah,
you’ve heard about. Yeah, sure. Sarah, what are you thinking? I’ve
gone very close to that, actually. 1875. 1875. And you’re thinking the same thing? Yeah. Kind of early 20th century.
Hugh, what are you saying? I’ve gone for 1860. Wow. 1860. All very close. Holly, what do you think?
’39. 1839, 1839. All very close, all
in the 19th century. Must be, right? You’d have thought. It feels
like it was a Victorian book. I’m suddenly now thinking
was it 1950s? No, it wasn’t. No, it really wasn’t. Hugh would have remembered
when it came out. What have you gone with at home? Cheeky minx. What is the answer? Who has scored a point here? Mrs Beeton was born… Whoa! Holly, well done!
Very nicely done. Well done! Very good. She’d be flattered as well, that I
got her. Yeah, 1861, that was published. 22 years old. Good Lord! Let’s take a look at your next one. Again, it’s one of those annoying
things where it’s something you’ve heard of, but
when did it happen is the question. Sarah Greene, we’ll start with you.
What are you thinking here? I’ve gone for…1536. It sounds like a convincing year.
Does it? It sounds like a year from history,
doesn’t it? It does. That’s what I’m thinking. Hugh? I went for 1641, which
I’m fairly confident is wrong. That sounds like a year from history
as well, though. So far, these are exemplary. Holly? 1505. 1505, says Holly. And Nish? I’ve gone 1457. 1457. So, we’ve got 14s, 15s
and 16s there. What do you think at home?
When did this happen? When was Martin Luther
excommunicated and who has scored a point? The points go to… Oh, you are kidding me! By one year, the point goes to Sarah. Oh! Wow! Sarah was 15 years out, Holly was
16 years out. Oh, good Lord! One final question in this round.
Oh, that was so close! What year did this happen, please? Hugh, we will start with you. What are you thinking? 1692. Any reason or just…? No. No. I wouldn’t know where to begin
with this one. No reason at all. I got you. 1692, says Hugh. Holly, any ideas? 1621. 1621. Again, maybe. Nish? 1621. Shut up! No! Without looking? Yeah. No!
No, yeah, with no reason either. It’s like Zachariah all over again. If you say 1692, Sarah… Oh, my God! No, 1702. Oh, wow! 1702. So, everyone is fairly close. A couple of you are very close
to each other. 1621, 1702, 1692. What do you reckon at home?
Let’s find out. When was the Russian city
of St Petersburg founded, and who has scored a point? Oh, wow! Oh, wow! Sarah Greene, wow!
APPLAUSE One year out.
Was that a total guess? Within, I don’t know, a 50-year
period, yes, it was a total guess. Wow! That’s very, very well played,
Sarah Greene. Tablets away, please. I was 11 years out,
you were a year out. One more hour to go before we crown our House Of Games
champion of champions. All four of these players
are previous champions, they’re previous winners. One of them is about to win
a golden trophy. One round to go. Let’s take a look
at the scores going into that round. Nish, you’ve been deadly in this
last round all the way through. We said someone just needs a lead
over you before this round, and someone’s got a lead over you. Hugh, you’ve got a two-point lead going into this final round. APPLAUSE No-one has ever won five in a row. Nish is so good
at this final round. Can we stop Nish at the last hurdle
or is he going to do it? Let’s find out, shall we,
as we play… For the final time. Four previous
winners, they are back for more. Who is going to take home
the trophy? Who is going to win
Friday’s House Of Games? Your first category is… Those will be the pictures.
There’ll be a clue underneath. Buzz in with the correct answer,
you get a point. Buzz in with an incorrect answer,
you lose a point. Here we go. Best of luck to everybody
for the final time. No? No-one risking it. It is… Oh! Don’t Stop Me Now! Argh! Sophie Okonedo
and Don’t Stop Me Now. Of course! Here’s your next stage actor
and your next clue. Nish? It’s Rafe Spall
Quiet On The Western Front. Is it Rafe Spall
Quiet On The Western Front? It is, well done. This is why he’s winning. Very impressive stuff, Nish. Next stage actor. Sarah? Ruth Wilson Phillips. Ruth Wilson, Wilson Phillips. Well done, Sarah. Nicely played. That’s good, yeah. Here’s your next category. Oh, God! Those will be the pictures.
There’ll be clues underneath. Yes, Hugh? Bill Oddiesel. It is. Bill Oddie, diesel. Bill Oddiesel.
That’s great. That’s hard. Some of them are more satisfying
to say than others, aren’t they? Bill Oddiesel. Yeah.
Next wildlife presenter. Yes, Nish? Steve Irwindsor Castle. It is. Steve Irwindsor Castle from
Steve Irwin and Windsor Castle. Well played, Nish.
Next wildlife presenter. Shall I tell you? Yes. Liz Bonnin, Indianapolis. Next category. Nish? Corner flagatha Christie. Is it corner flagatha Christie? Absolutely is.
Corner flag, Agatha Christie. APPLAUSE Splendid! Here’s your next one. KLAXON
Gosh! There are no more.
What does that mean? Good round for Nish there,
but Hugh did have a lead. Yeah. Have we just seen
our first five in a row or did Hugh just pip him there? Let’s take a look at the final
scores on Friday’s House Of Games. It’s a tie! It’s a tie between Nish and Hugh. LAUGHTER So, we go down to a tie-breaker. Is it one of these?
It’s an Answer Smash. Oh, God! That’s unfair.
Yeah, that is unfair. And it’s the difference between
Nish being the first person ever to win five in a row and not. So, we’ll do you one more from the Things Found
On A Football Pitch. Buzz in with a correct answer,
you are today’s winner. Buzz in with an incorrect answer, your opponent is today’s winner. I wish you both
the very, very best of luck. Hugh? Barley, is it? A tiny bit more. Oh, crossbar…ley. Crossbarley is
the right answer, Hugh. I just call it the bar. You are Friday’s winner.
Yeah, I would just call it the bar. I needed crossbarley, but you’ll
accept… Oh, God, 100%, yeah. In a way, that’s a great metaphor
for your moment. Yeah. Nearly scored the full five.
Nearly got it. But it hit the crossbar.
Just hit the crossbar. HE GASPS He hit the crossbar of life. Hugh, you’ve won
Friday’s House Of Games. Congratulations. APPLAUSE It means you take home
a prize as well. I’m delighted, but I’m mostly
delighted about stopping Nish. LAUGHTER You know what? I’m not. We all are. He’s so much better
than the rest of us. Hugh, what would you like
to choose here? Well, I’m actually going to take
the luggage… Taking the luggage. ..if I can. Hugh Dennis takes home
a House Of Games wheelie case. Congratulations, Hugh. But we have
something else to give away. It’s not all about wheelie cases
on this show. It’s also about this little thing,
this little beauty. I say beauty, it’s actually quite… Hugh, you talked earlier in the week about the sound of your trophy
and how it sounds quite cheap, OK? I just want to prove to you
this is a much classier thing. DULL RING Hello! Ooh! I mean… Who is taking this home?
I think we know. It’s been a terrific week. Let’s take a look
at the final leaderboard. Our winner of the House Of Games,
House of Champions, Nish Kumar! Congratulations, Nish.
There’s your trophy. What a win! What a guy!
APPLAUSE Couldn’t quite do
the five out of five. Hugh stopped him doing that.
But what a performance all week. He was kind of unstoppable,
wasn’t he? Yeah. That final round, time after time.
Nish, how are you feeling? I feel absolutely elated.
Hugh, how are you feeling for stopping him winning
five out of five? I feel more elated than Nish,
I think. LAUGHTER Thank you all so much
for coming back. All winners. A pleasure to see all of you again. Congratulations
on a great week’s quizzing. Hugh, congratulations today.
Nish, what a week. Congratulations, brilliant stuff.
Our champion is Nish Kumar. We’ll see you again next time
on the House Of Games. APPLAUSE Would you be really upset
if I took your face off it? LAUGHTER